It has been almost two weeks since our little girl joined this world. Let me tell you, it has taken me two weeks to emotionally recover from this experience. Let me start at the beginning. I had a planned c-section. Between my spinal fusion and the fibroids and cysts in my uterus, it was best for her and myself. This was our birth plan and if you don’t have anything nice to say then please don’t say anything.
We arrived at the hospital at 5:30 AM to get prepped for my 7:30 AM surgery time. Phillip, myself, and my mom all arrived together and was checked into my prep room. First, they set up the monitors to track the babies heartbeat as well as mine. After that they asked me a million questions about my pregnancy, our birth plan, vaccinations, my mental health, everything! While, one nurse was asking me questions another put my IV in. I hate needles, so for me this was the worst part! Thankfully, I had an awesome nurse who was super quick!
Now for the fun part. If you have or had a planned c-section than you have heard about the dreaded shave! I had two false alarms this pregnancy. The first one, when I thought my water broke I made Phillip shave me (or attempt too!) He ended up bringing me a mirror and I did it myself! LOL But, when it came to my planned day it was something I completely forgot to do! But, it was actually super easy at the hospital and not a big deal at all!
As it got closer to the time, more of our family started to arrive. My dad arrived shortly after we did and came into our room and gave us a big hug and took some photos of my belly and Phillip and I! My Grandparents and Aunt came next, each coming in to see us before! Then my brother in law came, but I missed him by a few minutes I hear!
Phillip got changed into that super cute blue suit and scrubbed up. I WALKED into the OR and prepared myself for the spinal tap… another needle! While they were prepping me the anesthesiologist came in and told me my back was going to be tricky. It usually takes him about two minutes to get a spinal tap working and with me it could take longer because of the scar tissue and fusion that I have. If there was a problem and it didn’t work I would need to get put under general anesthesia, something I didn’t want!
The spinal tap did take longer than usual, and the one “bee sting” became three because my back has so many issues (insert hand over face emoji!) BUT, he got it! He later told me getting that spinal tap in the correct spot would be like getting a school bus through a door way! So, thank you Dr. Park! They hurried up and whipped my feet over the table, I immediately couldn’t feel anything waist down! They put up the blue curtain, which was a lot closer to my face than I had imagined and then started the first cut. After a few minutes, but what felt like forever… they brought Phillip back into the room! He looked so excited, that I was overwhelmed by emotions and tried my hardest not to cry! He sat next to me until Dr. Park told him to stand up and watch his child being born, something neither of us thought he would see! Phillip later told me that my doctor was literally on top of me pushing her out! Also, when they take your child out you feel way more than just some pressure! I literally felt like a semi truck was on top of my chest! She came out and immediately I heard her cry. My first question to Phillip was what does she look like? (insert another hand over face emoji.) Phillip told me she looked just like me, then immediately after goes… but she has your Dads nose! I was so happy that she was out of me and safe.
I had to wait five minutes before I could see her, which really did feel like a lifetime! They had to test her at one minute old and then at five minutes old. After she passed her tests and didn’t need to go to NICU, they brought her to see me. I got the shakes really bad during my c-section. So, when they brought her to me I was just trying not to let my whole body shake! I don’t think I really saw her and looked at her until I was in my normal room about two hours later! Phillip took her and went to recovery to do skin to skin with her until I got there. I had a cyst that we wanted removed so my doctor took that out right after the baby was born. The cyst ended up taking longer than she thought to remove and I lost a lot of blood so this also took longer than expected. So much so, that Phillip asked one of the nurses to check on me and make sure everything was alright. Everything went well and the cyst was removed!
They moved me from the OR table to a rolling bed and rolled me right into recovery to see Phillip and my baby! Phillip put her on me almost immediately and I was still shaking! We took a few minutes being by ourselves and then I was dying to see my Mom so Phillip went to go get her! My mom came in and instantly cried, she was so happy to meet her granddaughter and see that I was ok! We were in recovery for about 45 minutes before I was moved to my normal room.
We got into our room and the nurse gave us some time as a family, checked to make sure my uterus was in place(which wasn’t that painful at all, but I think I was still medicated!) Then, she told Phillip we could have people come in! So, Phillip went to the waiting room and brought our family in. My dad and brother in law basically tackled everyone so they could be in that room! My brother in law is also Carolines God father so this was a special moment for him too! All of our family members started to trickle in and spend time with her! I still felt out of it but totally enjoying the moment!
About two hours in, our pediatrician came in to check on her. She was very frantic and immediately told us that a nurse in NICU said there were signs she had down syndrome. A little side story, about six weeks before this when I was praying before bed I felt God clearly tell me that something was going to happen but not to worry that everything was going to be ok. I thought that my water was going to break early and it would freak me out that she was going to be born so early. So- right when the doctor said this I immediately thought about what God had told me. Phillip though, took it very hard. We spent three days doing multiple tests and ultrasounds on her. Those three days were probably the longest of our lives. This happy moment turned into one of the worrisome in seconds. I was shocked at how strong I stood. I didn’t have a melt down until two days later and it was because I knew the results were coming in the next morning and I was scared to get bad news and not have my mom there. (They have strict visiting hours that didn’t start until 11 a.m. and the doctor always came before 9 a.m.) I tried to stay strong but even Phillip had been a mess for two days. I had never seen him like this before. All the results came back in on Wednesday morning that everything looked great… we both cried tears of joy!
Let me tell you, it was a testament to my faith and I’m so glad I listened to God. Otherwise, I would have been a disaster. Later on, my doctor told me that she just thought she looked like a breached baby… thanks for telling us lady! Caroline had been breached most of my pregnancy, and one side of her face was a little smushed because of it!
We ended up leaving the hospital the next day, in the pouring rain! We got to our house and I immediately carried her up the stairs to put her in a cute outfit. I think I forgot my body just had a c-section. With all the tests they ran I really do think mentally, I switched off how I felt and just wanted to take care of Caroline and Phillip! That made my second week of recovery extra exhausting. But, overall recovering from a c-section was easy for me. I was a little sore but I was going up and down the stairs, getting in and out of bed, changing her diapers… everything I thought would take me a couple of weeks, I was doing the day we got home! We feel so blessed that we were able to have this child. Whatever the results were it wouldn’t have mattered to us. We loved this little girl the day we found out about her and its only grown since!
I wanted to share some of my favorite photos from the day she was born!